I Don’t Know What To Tell You: Grief Week 15

I remember in the 90’s there was a lot of talk about co-dependency, and I thought that meant depending on someone so much, you couldn’t function without them. It was a sort of addiction, in a way. At least it was to my understanding. But the entire purpose of a marriage is for you to […]

I Don’t Know What To Tell You: Grief week 14

Things come up when you least expect them. My new DH (dear hubby) said he found something in the suitcase and it was potentially emotional. He asked if I thought I could handle it now or later. Having no idea what it was, and he afraid to go into much detail, I thought I could […]

I Don’t Know What To Tell You: Grief Week 5

One of the hardest things about losing a loved one, is the feeling of strangling, lingering grief and loss at, not only things you used to do together, but things you had planned to do together. Do you go ahead and do them alone? With someone else? Are the things you used to do together […]

I don’t know what to tell you: week 1 of GRIEF

It’s very hard to write about grief while in the midst of it. C.S. Lewis wrote his book on grief–A Grief Observed–while going through the process. He was a well established author by then, and there could be no other way to work it out for him. Joan Didon was also an established writer of […]

Grief: Survivors Guilt

“If I die,” Sam told me from his hospital bed, “I want you to be okay.” “You’re not going to die.” I told him. Though he probably couldn’t hear me, even with his CI (Cochlear Implant) on. It was always hard for him to hear when he was distracted, and he was very distracted at […]

Lights

Lights were a big theme in my marriage to Sam. Yesterday I took the lights in our room down. It made me emotional and moody the entire day. I tried to explain why to a friend, but Sam said it better: Is this not a reason for tears if I shed them? Whether for joy, […]